Parents, Are You Doing Too Much for Your Child?

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by Emma Lawson,

Raising a child to become an independent, intelligent and responsible adult is a very challenging task, which is why it is very easy for parents to get on the slippery slope. They often tend to be overprotective, which is counterproductive rather than helpful. Children easily get used to any kind of help from their parents, and that becomes the main reason for their inability to take care for themselves later in life. If you think that you are doing too much for your child, stay with us. Here are some useful tips on how to deal with such a problem.

Don’t Step In Before the Child Asks for Help



Parents are often too quick to jump in and help, even though the child didn’t even ask for help. Be careful with this, because, believe it or not – it can cause frustration in your child. Parents’ interference, even though it is good-intention, can cause kids to under-function later in life. The reason is simple: they will always expect mom or dad to do everything for them, because they are accustomed to not doing anything for themselves. So, instead of jumping in immediately, wait for them to ask for help. Even then don’t do it for them – but show, so that they can learn.

Don’t Complete Even the Simplest Task for Them

Some of the simplest home-related tasks, such as taking out the trash or tidying up their room definitely should be done by kids, and not by you. Why would you buckle their seat belt or brush their teeth, when they can to that by themselves? If they never try, children will never know that they are completely able to do such simple tasks all by themselves. Choose some that are appropriate for their age, and then expand them over time.

Serenity Heist with mother Michelle doing chores.


Let Them Make Mistakes

The truth is that it’s very hard to see your children fail at something, but that is an extremely important part of growing up. They will be able to learn from their mistakes, which is exactly why parents should not over-function for them. It is not such a big deal if they spill the ketchup on your new tablecloth, scrape their knees or get the answer wrong. These situations will teach them to become more careful and considerate.

Motivate Them Towards Responsible Behavior

You may not even realise that you are doing too much for your child until you start to burn out. When this happens, it is important to motivate them towards more responsible behavior simply by stepping back. You should explain them that they can take care of themselves, which will largely help them grow up into responsible and independent young people. Education has a crucial role here, too, particularly some methods such as Montessori – it encourages children to naturally learn self-discipline and order. Besides that, it is very effective in developing particular skills and social behavior. This is exactly why parents should carefully choose the appropriate program for their precious ones.

About admin

Jaishri is an IT professional and the founder of mommyswall. She is a mom of a lovely 4 year old and lives in Bangalore. She is also a certified Yoga instructor and believes in Natural living.
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One Response to Parents, Are You Doing Too Much for Your Child?

  1. Susila Raman says:

    Good parents who try to do the right things are damned if they do, and damned if they don’t.
    by the way the things you have share its pretty cool.

    Susila Raman recently posted…Simple Brain Exercises that Help Boost Your Child’s IQ

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